daft as a drizzle
by symposium magarum
Summary: N had insisted that they play in the rain yesterday, and Touya could tell the moment he stirred a bit earlier than usual that N was sick.


ⅰ.  
Touya always wakes up first, likes the feel of virgin sunlight filtering through the leaves scattered along his windowsill and spilling onto his skin; much to his dismay, he awakens to one of the many springtime rainfalls of Nuvema Town, sky overrun with thick grey clouds restraining the sunlight with their tightly-wound but still soft and delicate bodies pressed together.

He turns to glance at N, who is still curled up and asleep, lips parted and breathing even, arms tucked into his chest like a child, and Touya can't help but smile. For once, he doesn't think, only watches N and feels the usual profound stirring in his chest but doesn't dwell on it; Touya takes in the gentle ebb-and-flow of N's soft and warm breath, the slopes of his body, some still soft and pink and youthful, and instead remembers happy things, simple things- things like N's scent and the feel of his hair and the beauty behind the life radiating from his eyes.

Touya's gaze lingers a bit longer as he wonders what's gotten over him; with a shake of his head, he scoots off the bed to step closer to the window and watch the rain.

ii.  
N had insisted that they play in the rain yesterday and Touya could tell the moment he stirred a bit earlier than usual that N was sick. His flushed face and the scratch restraining his usually jovial tone only confirms this and N looks abolsutely devastated, heartbroken.

He manages a weak apology, lips downturned into the most upset of pouts as Touya draws their blankets up to the other boy's chin, a half-smile tugging at his mouth.

"It's okay, N," he says as he sits at the edge of the bed. "Why are you even sorry? It's not your fault."

The sadness in N's eyes is palpable and Touya is almost worried that something may be amiss with him, but N draws the sheets up to cover everything but his eyes and he glances away, face red and sick and ashamed.

His words are muffled, but Touya can understand him. "I wanted us to play again."

Touya can only smile and lean down to press a kiss to N's warm forehead.

iii.  
On this curiously rainy springtime morning, N decides that he does not feel like taking a nap despite his body needing the rest more than ever.

Touya doesn't know what to feel or how to react. Truthfully, he is unsurprised.

iv.  
He tries bringing N soup, hoping inwardly that the warmth spreading throughout him and the sensation of a full stomach will soothe his ailing body into slumber.

It's a vegetable soup, N's favorite kind, meticulously prepared with all the love and attention in the world (though Touya will admit, his gaze did drift every now and then to the open windows; he was mesmerized by the way the rainwater would splash against the glass and leave these incomprehensible patterns and drips whose silhouettes resembled the outlines of continents), with effort and diligence and devotion.

In his time downstairs, Touya had discovered that his mother was out for the day, leaving him to his thoughts and the warmth of the used stove as he savored the silence and solitude for a few long minutes. The downtime doesn't last long because N is clinging to the edges of his mind and their Deerling have awoken from their sleep and are shuffling awkwardly through the house in search of food.

With a smile, Touya tends first to the Pokémon; it's become second nature to him, and he supposes spending so much time with N is the cause of this, because while Touya has always thought himself kind to Pokémon whenever the opportunity came up, to make a point of being loving and gentle, to put them first like one would their own children- it's something he never gave much thought towards or realized was even something worth noting, but apparently N found this paternal sort of diligence admirable.

As he fills the tiny Deerlings' bowls, the sound of dry food clattering against porcelain filling the monotonous silence around them, Touya realizes that the more he thinks about it, the easier it's become for him to focus on minute details and appreciate how slow the passage of time truly is now that he has met N. The world is different now, he realizes, and it's probably one of the most profound and wonderful things he's ever had to grow into.

He puts the Pokémon food away before returning to the stove, soup still simmering gently like all the love and attention in the world waiting to one day bubble over and burst from a heart, and watches the fruit of his efforts for a few more moments before turning the fire off, preparing a bowl and heading upstairs.

Thankfully N doesn't demand to be fed this time, instead sits with a pillow on his lap to shield him from the heat, and sips the fluid from his spoon.

Touya watches as color spreads throughout N's body and he seems to ride the wave of spreading warmth. He watches the flicker in his eyes and the gentle bob of N's throat as he swallows, the way his ears turn red from something wonderful making him flush; he observes the ginger touch with which N holds his spoon, fingers curled in a way that was purely aristocratic, and the way N tucks his hair behind his ear with every other sip; he whole thing is happy and simple and beautiful in its monotony.

"This is delicious," N says with a sunlight-soft smile as he spares a glance to Touya. "Thank you."

So many little things, he thinks; Touya can only smile, sit by N's side, and wonder what's gotten over him today.

v.  
Touya is praising his lucky stars when N has finally agreed to lay down and appears to be half-asleep, but the chorus of hallelujahs are cut short when their Deerling wander into the room, tiny hooves clacking against the wood of Touya's floorboards.

Predictably, he moment they enter, N sits up to alertness, a cheery and warm smile washing over his pale features as he holds a hand out to the pair of Pokémon, and for a moment Touya would dare to say he looks well enough to brave the rain again.

"We should name them," he says, looking over at Touya with a delicate smile that held a subtle sort of pride and joy Touya recalls only seeing in his mother's eyes. "Since they look alike. Wouldn't it be nice to differentiate them?"

"I don't see why not," Touya extends his own hand to N's Deerling, and the little darling noses the back of his hand, black and wet and warm with life. She looks up at him, big glassy eyes blinking curiously as her companion, Touya's Deerling, hops onto the bed to curl up at N's hip, the pink and white of his fur rising and falling in the steady rhythm of sleep.

"Did you have any names in mind?" Touya dares to break the silence induced by simply observing the Pokémon as N's Deerling nudges his knee with her muzzle, demanding affection. As he scratches her beneath her chin, Touya continues, "I haven't really given it much thought."

N smiles this curious smile, soft and secreting something known only to himself in this poorly guarded but still capricious manner not unlike clouds hiding sunlight, and for a moment he seems lost in a beautiful daydream as he fingers the bright yellow flower atop Touya's Deerling's head, and the two of them are the picture of serenity and understanding.

"I had only glanced in the name book for infants your mother has," N says, voice still scratchy from sickness but managing to carry the sound of grace and love and clarity along with it, and he looks up, smiling at Touya in this almost shy way as if he had admitted something embarrassing.

"And?"

"I like Constanza for a girl," he begins, a small smile tugging at his lips as he gives his head a thoughtful tilt. "And for a boy, perhaps Thomas? Your Deerling looks like a Thomas to me."

Touya turns to watch him for a moment and wonders fleetingly if N had ever wished for a family, a life, a happy ending outside of his realm of make-believe. It's a beautiful dream and N has a heart as daft as a drizzle and pure as spring rain.

"I like those," Touya says, giving N a nod and a smile, acquiescing to his dream and happily giving him whatever he wants.

vi.  
The discussion of names soon evolves into a discussion of marriage, and N and Touya are sitting across from each other, N's legs drawn up to his chest, blankets bunched at his ankles, Touya's own legs crossed he observes this part of N he never really paid all that much attention to, and Touya decides that N has nice legs, can't help but reach out with both hands to trace along the edge of the boy's ankles.

"Tell me about marriage, won't you Touya?"

"Don't you already know about marriage and stuff?" Touya's tone is soft and patient as he glances upwards momentarily.

N smiles, arms curled beneath his knees as he peers up at Touya from beneath his lashes. "I want to hear it from you."

Touya makes a noise denoting absent thought, and for a long moment after he is silent as he simply enjoys the feel of running his fingers up and down N's ankles and the tops of his feet. Marriage, he decides, is a difficult thing to try and explain.

"It's when two people who want to be together forever make it official to their family and friends that they've found their special person," he begins, shifting forward slightly to press the ball of his palm to N's calf, simply to touch the soft skin and feel it, memorize it, know what it feels like so his curiosity will be sated. "They hold a big ceremony."

N tilts his head slightly, watches Touya touch him. "Where do these ceremonies take place?"

"Anywhere the couple wants, I guess," Touya says with a shrug. He feels the weight of N's stare and looks up, meeting sweet and warm grey eyes, and nearly misses it when N's hands slide out from beneath his knees to take Touya's own busy extremities.

"What happens in a wedding?" N asks with a delicate, curious voice that is callow and childish and perfect to Touya's ears.

Touya smiles slightly and looks down at their joined hands before curling both of his around one of N's pale extremities. "First they exchange rings, I think," and he makes a gesture of slipping an invisible ring on the appropriate finger.

N chuckles and squares his shoulders before slipping his hand out of Touya's only to take one of the other boy's and imitate the gesture with a bit more deliberation and finesse. When he looks up, his expression has lit up and he clearly wants the next step.

"Then they look into each others eyes and say their vows," and before N can ask what the vows are, Touya clears his throat, ducking down momentarily to gather his bearings, face a bright red for reasons he will never understand, before looking to N's eyes. "You're supposed to...repeat after me."

"Okay," N says with a nod and a smile, squeezing Touya's hand. Something about him exudes nervousness, but Touya puts it aside for the sake of their demonstration.

"I, Touya."

"And I, N."

While his memory is foggy on the exact words, Touya does his best to recall the rites exchanged by lovers in order to not only appease N, but also pacify something within himself that was as consistent and true as the springtime overcast fated to always wander through Nuvema one week out of the season, and he swallows hard, imagining his and N's own wedding to help move him along.

Does N want to get married, he wonders once again, does N want to start a family with a daughter and a son named Constanza and Thomas; would they live in Nuvema Town near to Touya's family or would they go somewhere like Accumula Town, romantic and small and quiet, or somewhere lively and as eternally spirited as Castelia City where they could experience the night and culture and finally get N a fabled Castelia Cone.

Perhaps they could get a house in Undella where no one knows them, or better yet move to a whole new region entirely like Sinnoh or Hoenn. There were still so many things Touya himself wanted to experience, and he was still but a boy on a very long journey that wasn't quite over yet, and N's life had barely just begun. Touya himself might have been just as callow as N in some respects, but as he stares into N's eyes and laces their fingers together, Touya knows there is nothing he is more sure of right now, nor will anything this promising and pure ever come to him ever again.

"On this morning, err- take N to be my lawfully wedded husband."

The two share a long gaze, faces red, fingers clutched, invisible wedding bands pressed together, and for a moment, Touya forgets about Constanza and Thomas, his mother and N's father, Zekrom, Reshiram and the rest of the world. Until this private ceremony is over, no one else will exist because Touya knows deep down that for all of his flighty-hearted whimsies he wants to satisfy, all the dreams left unspoken he has yet to make come true, he wants more than anything to share every moment from hereon until the very end of time with the person who means most to him.

"Go on, Touya," N's voice is a glass-fragile and waiting whisper. "What else?"

Touya steels his nerves, takes a deep breath and never loses sight of N.

"To have and to hold from this day forward. For better for worse, for richer for poorer- um," Touya squares his shoulders, smiles sheepishly in preemptive admission. "I forgot a lot of them, but-"

"It's okay," N soothes him with a reassuring smile and squeezes the hands in his. "Anything at all you can remember will be perfect, because this is a wedding just for us."

With that reassurance alone, Touya nods before continuing. "In sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."

"And I take Touya to be my lawfully wedded husband," N follows up quickly, shifting to where he is sitting on his knees before moving closer to Touya, all the excitement and adoration in the world in his eyes. "To have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."

They smile at each other, hands squeezing tight and reveling in the warmth of their shared lives, for both times yet to come and for times that had already passed, and between their gentle smiles Touya manages to find it within himself to wrap up the private ceremony.

"I do."

And when N says I do, Touya can tell that he means it, that this boy is going to be a permanent fixture in his life; he's almost surprised that they somehow wound up locked in a kiss on their own, Touya momentarily forgetting about N's cold and N himself forgetting about all that ailed his healing heart and all that bound him to bed that day.

When they pull apart, N is beaming, a true picture of a happiness most could only wish for, the most beautiful thing Touya has ever seen in this world.

"Does this mean the two of us are married now?" N asks in a low voice, a sacred hope uplifting his tone and beating out the ravages of sickness.

Touya can only embrace the other boy, wrapping his arms around N's chest and holding him tightly, face pressed to the curve of his neck as he momentarily loses himself to a wonderful daydream as N often did.

"Yep. The two of us are married now, N."

N makes a soft, delighted noise and curls his arms around Touya's shoulders before pressing his face against the boy's cheek. Touya can think of nothing more perfect, can think of nowhere he else he would rather be or anyone else he would rather be spending a rainy morning with.

vii.  
Touya can already feel himself falling under the weather and slowing down, and despite his determination to either stay up with N or find a way to trick the boy into falling asleep, he is the one who ends up succumbing to an oncoming cold by noon when the two of them are sharing bedspace together, laying side by side in a haphazard mess of rumpled sheets and scattered limbs.

Touya is flat on his back, head against the cool pillows, uncovered and watching the back of his eyes as he focuses on the warmth of N's body, which is pressed to his side. N's head rests upon Touya's chest, one arm folded and sandwiched between their bodies and the other draped over Touya's torso in a loose embrace.

The sound of the rain falling gently outside is soothing, and it's taking everything in Touya's power not to fall asleep; he can only assume N is facing the same dilemma because his breahting is softening into an even and slow tempo, his body relaxing in a way that could only mean one thing.

"Touya..."

The barely palpable whisper of N's weary voice only confirms the boy's tiredness, but Touya himself can't even muster the effort to open his eyes and watch his companion, so instead, with a sluggish and slow motion, he gropes about his stomach before finding N's hand and gripping it loosely to show him he is there.

In his own slow and sleep-laced voice, he replies, "What is it, N?"

There is a long pause as if the other boy is deliberating on his answer, but he reaches down to pull the blankets bundled at his hips up and over their bodies before slinging his arm back over Touya.

"I don't want to go to sleep," he mumbles, inhaling deeply and making a noise of relaxation despite his words. "I wanted us to play together a bit more."

"We'll play some more in a little while," Touya sighs, squeezing N's hand and cherishing the precious way N buries his face in Touya's chest. "Okay, N?"

N makes a soft noise of affirmation, gives a weak nod, and finally, finally falls asleep.


End file.
